My so-called best friend since the eighth grade, let's call her Z. I don't remember how we became friends; one day she was just there. I do remember my original best friend, whom I hadn't met two years prior, three years prior, was switching schools, which was a punch to the gut. I clearly adjusted because Z and I became friends fast. From eighth grade through the 12th, making posters for one another. It was good until college came and we were in the same seat, but hours from each other. We were both scared freshmen, so we spent the majority of the time on the phone with each other. Me watching her do science homework, and she watched me paint for an art class. Always trying to say that we were going to meet up five hours on FaceTime, barely saying a word. Time goes by. Sophomore year comes. We've made new friends by this point. The calls get less frequent. She doesn't really text me back or call me unless I say it's an emergency.So after Christmas, sophomore year, I decided to run an experiment, basically thinking, let's see how long it takes for her to call me back to text me, to see me. Six months went by, not a word, which taught me the valuable lesson then: I was more invested in our relationship than they were. So I'm in my sophomore year during my study abroad. I break and decide to text her, a simple high, to which she responds with a single waving hand emoji, which,h I'm not going to lie, made me crash out. And it's been four years since that, and I still think about it. If I was wrong, should I give it another chance? I don't know. But in the back of my mind, I'm still hoping she would reach out.